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Friday, September 21, 2012

Steady My Heart

DJ and Michelle
The last few months have been hard.  Many of you know by now. Our dear friend, DJ, went to be with the Lord in July.  He was a resident here at Camp Daniel.  He was a great man of love and forgiveness.    I am honored to have known him.  I have been dealing with his death.  It hurts.  A lot.  I miss him.

Back in April, I wrote about my new roommate, Crystal.  She has been living with me for the last five months.  Due to circumstances beyond our control, she had to move out.  My time with her was life-changing.  First, we had to get used to each other and build a relationship.  It was hard because I was trying to figure out how to be a sister/guardian/friend.  Once we got past that, things went a lot better.  She became a part of my family.  Things weren't always perfect, but they were good.  I needed her.  She needed me.  Letting her go was one of the hardest things I have had to do.  The house is very empty without her.  She will always be a part of my heart.   She will always be my family, no matter what happens.

I found out tonight that I have lost all of my monthly supporters.  I have no regular money coming in.  I know beyond a shadow of a doubt that this is what God wants me to be doing.  Monthly support continues to be a struggle.  I am asking if you would be one of my monthly supporters.  I will forge ahead because I know He will be there.  He will provide.  Will you forge ahead with me?

It's crazy because there is fear, doubt, and pain.  Yet in the midst of that, there is faith, trust, and growth.  I am learning to accept the hard times.  He has not sheltered me from this storm but each circumstance pushes me further in, so there is nothing left but Jesus.  It hurts, but it is a good place to be.  He will steady my heart.

Kari Jobe "Steady My Heart"
Even when it hurts
Even when it's hard
Even when it all just falls apart
I will run to you
Cause I know that you are
Lover of my soul
Healer of my scars
You steady my heart

2 comments:

Anonymous,  September 21, 2012 at 1:12 AM  

God will always be there for you in the good times and the bad. Keep pushing forward with your eyes on Him. He loves you and He knows what's best for you. It might not seem like it at times, but He does.

Little Tony September 22, 2012 at 2:06 PM  

Molly, I am so thankful that you are part of our family. God has blessed us here at CD to have someone who so steadily moves forward in their life towards the growth God has. I know you hurt right now, I know there are doubts at times, but I know Gods call is on you, so I know I do not have to worry about you. You know we bear your burden and are in this with you and together will move through all this. You are a warrior, and I am so proud to be fighting the war with you. We will fight those lonely feelings of loss and abandonment together, we will march forward even when there are mounting losses. Know that God knows your pain, your desires and your limits and will love you closer to Him through it all. Just keep on trusting and asking for grace to trust Him more. I love you, and thank you for fighting beside me.
LT

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