Don't just DO something, SIT THERE

Don't just do something, Sit there.

I think this is an old Buddhist quote. It's interesting because this way of life, this mindset, is totally opposite to the way we live here. We are always on the go, doing a million different things. Rarely do we take time to be quiet or be still. I know that I always like to have music playing. I heard the quote this week and it convicted me, but not in the way they mean. This quote convicted me to be still at the feet of Jesus. It has been a long time since I have done that. There has been so much other noise lately that I think it has drowned out God's voice in my life. I can't tell his voice from any other. I need to get rid of that noise. There is the story of Mary and Martha when Mary sat at Jesus' feet. Jesus said that Mary had chosen what was right and it would not be taken away from her. God wants us to be still. Lets all take time to SIT THERE.

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Compassion International

Live simply so they simply live- Richmond Wandera

Compassion International is a great organization that helps poor children in other countries receive food and education. This is one way that I have been able to make a difference. For the last six years, this organization has been a part of my life. God convicted me to stop spending money on CDs and entertainment. I have supported one little girl for the last six years. It cost $32 a month and that pays for food, clothing, and education. This is a great organization because all of the money goes to the kids. The best part is that they get to learn about Jesus Christ. The children you sponsor send you letters and you get to build a relationship with them. I now sponsor two little girls from Africa. We write letters back and forth and they are very dear to my heart. What a difference it would make if every family sponsored a child! I know that it has changed families and been great for the kids to learn about compassion and giving. The experience has been so rewarding for me. Instead of spending money on myself, I get to spend it on someone else. I can't help everyone, but I CAN help these two little girls. I know that their bellies are full and they will have more opportunities that would otherwise be unreachable to them. I get to speak truth, love, and encouragement into their lives. I get to be a part of their lives, even though I am halfway across the world. I couldn't ask for anything more.

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Why Don't People Give a Crap About Human Life?

There is a lot of bad stuff going on in this world, a LOT of bad stuff. We as Americans are so oblivious, so clueless to what is REALLY going on in the rest of the world. Why aren't people doing something? Why aren't people getting off their butt and making a difference?

It makes me mad when one of those commercials come on for adopting animals from the pound. Don't get me wrong, I think those organizations are a good thing. I like animals, I have two of my own. I just don't understand how people can feel so sorry for those animals when human life isn't being taken seriously? Why don't people feel the same way about starving children in Africa or someone being abused right next door? I'm not going to be able to help animals until children are taken care of.

There are child soldiers in Africa. Children are taught to be killing machines. This has been going on for years and not many people have done much about it. Big pharmaceutical companies are sending drugs to be tested in Africa and it doesn't matter if they kill a lot of people along the way. Now, the second example is a movie, but I'm sure that the big pharmaceutical companies ARE sending drugs to be tested in Africa. They send knock off drugs there so what is stopping them? I mean, it doesn't matter right? Those people in Africa were just going to die anyways. They will either get AIDS or starve to death. It will be as if those Africans never existed. But they DID exist. Each one of them has a face, and a name. I sit here crying angry tears for these children. Why aren't people putting an end to this? Some are trying, but it is hard to get others to care. The people that ARE in power in the US and Europe that COULD make a difference, they are only concerned about their fat wallets. Why don't people give a crap about human life? Why is it that people only care about money?

This stuff is going on halfway across the world and it seems like we can't make a difference, but WE CAN. We can spread the word about these child soldiers and get informed about those issues that are happening not just in Africa, but in the world. We need to be especially aware of the injustices going on right in our own towns and cities. Human life is taken for granted every day. I want my life to mean something. I want to make a difference in this world. The journey is what matters. I can't sit here while all of these horrible things are going on around me. My spirit is restless. I want to make a difference in this cruel world or die trying.

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I Will Miss You

A friend of mine died a couple of weeks ago. She was only 21 years old. Jenny was killed by a drunk driver. We were really good friends when we were in middle school. We kind of grew apart after that, but I still loved her. I will always love her. I hadn't talked to her in six years. It is so unfair. Why did she have to die? I know that she accepted Christ in high school. I can hold on to the fact that Jesus took her home.

Jenny and I had a lot of fun together when we were kids. Jenny was fun and beautiful. We used to laugh a lot. I spent a lot of time at her house and we would watch movies and bake cookies. We loved to jump on the trampoline. We went to the fair together one year. That was a fun night. I remember that we loved to watch Grease. She had the cd and we would sing the songs a lot. She was a great friend, not just to me, but to many others.

All week I struggled with going to her funeral. I didn't want to deal with the pain. I knew it would mean a lot to her mom if I went. I had made the decision that I wasn't going to go. About an hour before the funeral a friend of mine called and asked if I was going. When she called I knew that the Lord wanted me to go. It was hard, but I'm glad that I went. The pain of her death was more real than anything I have ever experienced. Seeing her body was kind of horrific for me. She wasn't just gone, she was lying right in front of me. At first, I didn't know how to deal with the pain. I just tried to shove it down and avoid it. That didn't last for long because the pain was really intense. She was on my mind constantly. There was a heaviness in my chest, like I couldn't breathe. The heaviness in my gut almost made me sick.

I finally just let the pain come. The weight that I was feeling has lifted a bit. Each day it gets a little better but I still think about her a lot. Pain like that brings you to a place where there is nothing left but the arms of Jesus holding you. Jesus is the only thing that keeps you afloat. This kind of pain is only a fraction of the pain that people with disabilities experience. This pain that God has allowed me to experience wasn't just for me. I think that God is allowing me an inside view in the life of people with disabilities so that I can relate to and understand them better. People with disabilities have become my world. I think God wants me to get a glimpse of the suffering that they face. And I think like anything else, you just don't get it until you experience it.

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